Like flying is so much fun anyway

Have you heard this story of the child with autism who was kicked off the airplane. We've all heard an autism "fit" before, haven't we? It really is hard to listen to, but anyone with common sense knows to just leave the child alone. Sometimes mom can help calm them down, sometimes they can't.

In case you only have half a brain cell in your head, let me make one thing clear- do NOT, under any circumstance, interrupt a cranky child with autism to tighten their seatbelt, repeatedly.

The kid is already hyper-stimulated because they're 1- in an airplane- surrounded by strangers- there's no way out... and the seat belt issue is really second to the child's peace of mind and the eardrums of the other passengers. True, turbulence can create a dangerous situation where a seatbelt restraint is necessary, but if the child is simply freaked out because he doesn't want his buckle too tight, then let him rest.

I think flight attendants have to be some of the most self-righteous bitches on the planet. OK- not all of them, but check out this story about a bitchy flight attendant. What the hell was her problem?

I will be flying in September, with my 9 month old and my 14 yr old, I hope I don't come across any bitchy flight attendants.

So far I haven't, in the past 14 years I've flown with kids exactly 6 times. There's a rule I totally don't get about flying with lap babies. If my baby is in a sling or front-pack carrier, I have been instructed to remove the baby from the carrier and let it sit, unrestrained on my lap. Has anyone else seen the early J-Lo movie where baby bubble is thrown from his momma's lap and dies in the plane crash? Wouldn't he have lived if he was in a sling or front carrier. I understand the possibility that my weight could crush the child. But I'd rather my child be crushed in my arms on my lap than to fly out of a hole in the plane to drown in the ocean or have the wind sucked out of him as he's hurled through the air. Just my preference. They should have a waiver.

I think the decision should be with the parent. I'd rather not have my child fry from my hands in a plane crash. I wonder what the percentage of plane crash victims survive anyways?

Oregon History Museum. OOPS- free parking!

Can you blame us, really for not noticing the meter, what with children needing coats, snacks, faces wiped, potty visits, finding the shoes they weren't supposed to take off in the car, losing the lid to the water bottle and THIS awesome mural.

Would it be naughty or rude of me to suggest that perhaps the mural was better than the museum? I guess that wouldn't be entirely true. The Oregon exhibit was cool- pioneer stuff and Oregon history. One of the downstairs rooms was horribly boring, the paintings looked dusty and old and boring, like maybe they're from Goodwill or something. The frames looked old-fashioned, like stuff I'd find in my Grandma's old house. I liked the baskets, but I'm a dork like that. Brandon liked the Navy stuff. There was a "shoes" thing where we saw some Chinese Women's shoes that were 4 inches long. My daughter was horrified when she learned of the old foot binding process, and made sure I knew that we really needed to look into adopting Chinese orphans.

Because bringing 6 little girls to a museum is simply not enough???

Stupid Oregon Gas-Pumpers

Today we went to the Oregon History Museum. Actually, first we drove all the way to Milwaukie (OK it was 10 minutes away) to go to the Safeway Fuel Station, because we have accumulated 90 cents in Power Pump Rewards, and that means 90 cents off per gallon. How wise to use it for a fill-up before driving 200 miles home, right. WRONG. Apparently Oregon doesn't do the power pump rewards program and the idiots who pump gas for a living in Oregon actually made fun of us for mentioning it. What the F*&& ever- you bonehead. That wasn't our only idiot gas-pumper story. How nice of the state to pass a stupid law for the sole purpose of employing people without brain cells.

The second gas-pumper incident involves us asking a gas pumper "where's the nearest Washington Mutual?" to which he replies "uuuum uuuhhh, wellll... I don't know, dude (heheheeh) sorry, man" and then, a lightbulb goes off "maybe that way..." points the wrong way on a one way street. So we circle around town for about an hour. Keeping our eyes open for a WAMU but really just looking at architecture, landmarks, people, no big deal. We find a wamu and head back for that intersection because it's really where we needed to be.

Darned if there isn't a frigging WAMU a block away from the jerk. How can you NOT KNOW about a business that's a block from your work. Are you blind? No- just an Oregon gas pumper.

What a great reason to go electric or use bio diesel. Sorry, man.

Oregon Zoo with 6 girls

What could be more fun than going to the Zoo? I know the answer to this one- going to the Zoo with ten thousand school kids. Yep, that's right. Our tranquil day of wandering around amidst the animals was peppered with, well, scared animals because these kids were far more wild than the animals in the zoo. The first thing we saw was this powerful leopard pacing back and forth, I think my 2 yr old thought it was a movie.



Our first stop was Lorakeet Landing. I managed to have a Lorakeet land on me, during a rare student-free moment.

The kids got to watch them eating up close, their tongues have like- bristles on them to help suck up the nectar.





What is it with men? Or is it just MY man? He sees a path. It must lead somewhere. Find the end of the path. Then you can leave. There should be a speed limit law when pushing a stroller through the zoo. We hardly saw anything because he was in such a hurry to reach the end of the path. OK- the kids were cold. Whatever. They didn't bring coats. The zoo should be relaxing though. I knew the zoo was going to be an issue for him, though. Next time we go to the Zoo we're not bringing him. Or he's not pushing. Or we'll bring coats. I think he needs to experience the zoo at a child's pace, it's so much more fun.

Quite funny actually that the sea lions were of interest to him. They're so graceful. He might have slobbered, I'll have to tease him about it later. It was warmer underground.



When my oldest was less than two, we had a friend who worked for Universal Studios. We went backstage at the Animal Show and met the trainers. Daughter actually played with Jethro the orangutan. They swung on a bar like... monkeys. They looked at each other a lot. In these pictures, we had turned a corner to find this orangutan hanging out by the window, watching the people go by. We felt a bit like we were on exhibit.

Portland Children's Museum

I had to lighten these in microsoft picture editor- probably should have used photoshop or gimp- they were all black & looked terrible. Still waiting for that new camera.





Can you believe all 5 of the pictures above were taken in the same room? I loved the gigantic macaroni picture frame. I wish it hadn't been cut off by the photographer. (oldest daughter) I love that I had my picture taken with Mrs March. All the girls enjoyed brushing the alligator's teeth. (Crocodile?)

The girls loved the market playroom and the play cafe. Here's M2 working at the grocery store. She asked one of her customers for the coupons. My apologies to the lady with the deer-in-the-headlights look. You can finish studying now. Good luck.

Littlest girl practiced crawling, her new hobby.



Here's everyone taking a break from the hustle and bustle of the museum to engage in the creative pursuit of pottery. Or clay sculpting, rather. I thought it was a Spartan warrior my husband was so carefully crafting, with his manly bum perched on top of an 18 inch high chair. For over an hour. Perhaps a representation of the war-like feeling that accompanies traveling with 6 children who like to run in different directions. Alas, however, it was a Mohawk Indian. I get it.



End of the day; my M1 and Mrs March's Meg enjoyed the Most Extinguished Guest trophy and E1 and I enjoyed the ball wall. I wonder if my husband would let me decorate my house like a children's museum. I'll bet he would, what a lucky girl I am.

OMSI in Portland

Today we went to OMSI. It was a madhouse. There were bus loads of school children everywhere. Some of them were animals, some of them were misbehaving. Some of the adults supervised them well, others did not. Overall, I'd rather have been there when it was less crowded. Not to self; next time wait until 2pm to go to the Science Museum in June.

We noticed that everywhere we go, Portland is covered in Dinosaurs. It's like some kind of cooperative theme or something. Here at OMSI they had a T-rex outside the door and this Pterodactyl flying over our heads in the lobby.

The kids got to dig for dinosaur bones. One of mine said "There's no dinosaur bones here, just these stupid pieces of wood." Well, those were supposed to "be" the bones. I guess there's no fooling her. And to top it off, she says; "And it's not even real dirt, it's like rubber." I'm thinking it's recycled tires, like the kind they use on playgrounds. Poor thing, she's seen a real Mammoth dig and this was definitely not what she had in mind.

Once she let go of her preconceived notions of what a dinosaur dig looks like, she had fun throwing the bits of rubber at her friends.

OMSI had a physics lab that was a lot of fun. I liked the water table. Kids liked the glass elevator "ride." Husband and I really liked the little exhibit about the world's water supply & clever inventions for de-salinating water and carrying it to remote villages and capturing rainfall for the garden.

We tried taking a family portrait. My camera has issues. I need a new camera. Do you hear that, Nikon, Olympus, Sony, Anyone? I've had this Samsung Digimax 301 for almost 5 years now and I'm done with it. The flash doesn't always work well and neither does the focus and I'm just plain DONE. Anyway, here's what our family portrait looks like when the camera's timer is failing. Isn't he sexy? No wonder we have so many kids.

Also of interest was the Submarine. There was one parked along the river. Being outside was wonderful, the weather had cleared up. I loved to see blackberries growing wild everywhere, it reminded me of Seattle. The kids found a snail, My oldest had a headache so she wasn't much fun. We ate Tuna sandwiches in the parking lot and went back to the hotel so the kids could swim some more. I wished we had done more sightseeing. I did get to swim, it was so very nice and relaxing. Baby enjoyed the water, so did the other kids.

We Made it to the hotel

We made it to the Comfort Suites Portland. The Drive was beautiful. Here's a shot from Multnomah falls. It rained the whole way here. I didn't check the weather before we left, but I did tell the kids to pack something warm. I'm sure they didn't. My husband thinks it's a sign of bad parenting if the kids are shivering without a coat. I think that forgetting to pack a coat when you were specifically TOLD to pack a coat is a logical consequence. Next time, I'll bet they pack a coat. What is it about road trips that makes us want to eat during the ENTIRE DRIVE? I swear, it's like a disease. It's a good thing I packed semi-healthy snacks.

The hotel- OK so far, we're just barely checked in. There seem to be a lot of kids here. I'm anxious to meet some of the moms I've made friends with online. Kids want to go swimming right away, the pool is full of kids. I wonder how many families are on this trip.

Portland Homeschoolers Field Trip

Today is the day. Here's the plan:

Check into hotel tonight- the Comfort Suites Portland Airport- pick up our Attractions Pass early in the morning and spend the 3rd at OMSI, the 4th at the Zoo and the 5th at the History Center.

The Attractions Pass actually has like 10 places we can go. We hope to hit the Children's Museum, the Pittock Mansion, the Art Museum and the World Forestry Center Discovery Museum.

See you there!